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100 day Trip Update- The Breakdown

  • April 29, 2016

So on day 12, I had a mini breakdown… Having stayed with friends for four days before, I experienced extreme luxury and was spoilt with great conversation. From that, I went into complete solitude. No cellphone reception, no people around me, barely any roads. I didn’t even stay at camp terrains. I literally set up camp at the side of the road. This made me quite venerable and very aware of my surroundings, for pretty much 24hours a day. I barely closed an eye.

 

I would describe myself as a cautious person. Weighing up risks carefully before taking them on. In this case I weighed them up over and over, and logically they made sense but I still needed to be aware and cautious of my surroundings. This drained me physically and emotionally. I’m pretty sure I’ll get used to it soon. Those three days however, was a bit too much.

 

All this said, I wouldn’t have had it any other way. I’m continuously realizing with how little recourses I can manage and survive. I am learning that I am in fact a strong individual. I’m pushing through all the challenges thrown at me, and getting emotional or overwhelmed by some, is not the worst thing.

 

My breakdown lasted a full 2hours (obviously the things that led up to it lasted longer). I cried. Prayed. Read Isaiah 40. Played guitar. And that was that. It might happen again? We’ll see. I didn’t intend for this journey to be a soul searching or emotional one. However, when you are alone 24hours a day, you can’t help but to learn more about yourself. I have dissed my emotional filter. I have no one to hide my emotions from, no one to impress or really consider. I could’ve bottled this breakdown up, not share it with anyone. Dealt with it “like a man”. Ha! I chose not to. Humans are not meant to be alone.

1 Comment on 100 day Trip Update- The Breakdown

  • Anica says:
    April 30, 2016 at 11:18 am

    Hi Dirk
    No humans are not meant to be alone but having alone time can be very good for the soul. Enjoy the journey and do make friends along the way!

    Reply

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